Tag Archives: lies

The Slow Fade

Deception these days can be purchased at a dime a dozen.
Over the years, mankind has evolved in intelligence and in cunningness. We have invented ways of making something repulsive and inappropriate appear cool. Initially we were aware of this process. We knew we were twisting some values. We engaged in inappropriate acts. What we probably knew but didn’t bargain for was The Change.
If I only needed 5g of “coke” to get high initially, chances are that by about 3 months of active doping, I would need more than that. Err… Dear Reader, you might prove me right by discovering a formula to determine how much more exactly I’ll need. Indeed, man is smarter!

It’s a slow fade –this thing!

So it wasn’t enough we started to tell what definitely we knew were lies,
We started feeling safe about telling these obvious lies,
(When it then came to matters of knowledge, morality and reality),
We had learnt to reason out and intellectualize controversial matters that seem unfavourable, the so-called “grey areas”,
We had learnt to twist issues into what they really are not,
We then started believing those lies to be truth,
We then began to stand up for the lies-become-truth,
We then learnt to proudly declare those lies to be truth and fact and acceptable.

Now, not only are values and truth re-defined and mutilated, our very psyches/minds are now not the same again. We can paint a white picture from black ink.

Song In The Darkness

This is my song in the darkness,
When the gloom chokes on my throat.
My dance in the water,
When my feet feels unsure.

Beginning as an uneasiness
Bubbling in my stomach;
Like the waves of a naughty sea
Rocking the boat playfully side to side;

The darkness crawled its way up my gut
Wanting total domination and expression.
Like the ocean feeling irritated
By my boat ON TOP of it.

En route its ascent it bypassed my heart.
Saving the best for last, maybe!
Like the ocean biding its time.
Conspiringly building up a hurricane!

A first creep out my throat,
And a dark foul mist seeped through.
Like that cursed wave
That cracked my boat.

But the external rules and constraints, and my shame
Wouldn’t allow it out wide.
Just as I could easily patch my leak
With some misconceptions and outward acts of good.

No way the darkness was giving up.
But it didn’t act as predicted.
Or, did the sea respect that sailor
Who patched a leak with clay?

Many mothers know how to get a baby’s mouth open –
Some pressure on the cheek near the jaw.
And many little children know how to wreck the hardest clay –
A little soaking in water with a little patience.

Darkness was better than that.
It grasped lower –my throat.
Knowing that with time, the clay would give way,
The sea just kept at it.

Going for my air, it knew that eventually
I’d open wide my mouth wide, or die.
After all, I couldn’t watch the inevitable happen;
I’d have to abandon a doomed boat.

So, would I allow my darkness out,
Or take it down with me to the grave?
Knowing that stepping out to see if I could stand
Would be better than sticking with a sinking boat.

This is my song in the darkness,
When the gloom chokes on my throat.
My dance in the water,
When my feet feels unsure.

See me give up the ghost,
As the darkness weakens its hold.
And I am staggering ON TOP of the sea,
Completely out of my safety boat.

I take my last breath,
As the darkness goes to sleep;
Leaving me at a loss for breath,
As the waters start flooding my lungs.

MY story ends here.
Not the expected happy ending.
The image of a drowning man,
Sinking faster than the speed of time.

Now, the birth of a new creature;
Living, darkness-free.
Who knew there was an island nearby,
And the drowning man would step on solid rock.

A new creature living for the light –
A light that engulfs and liberates.
So firm he could never go down again –
An island beyond dreams.

Now, there’s still a lot more darkness all around him.
That is another story!
For now, let him find security and certainty –
Much better than the illusion of safety on the boat.

P.S.: The darkness –the evil within.
The second half of each stanza dealt with the ocean part of the story. This has to do with the testing of those principles, mindsets and beliefs always believed to be true.