Seasons come, seasons go;
Time runs helter-skelter;
I stay the same.
People stay, people leave;
We keep some and lose others;
I stay the same.
Hardship comes, hardship goes;
The winds of change blow hard against my skin;
Yet I don’t budge.
I do not grow older;
I do not grow wiser;
Nothing it takes to change me.
Devoid of innocence of childhood;
Avoiding the throes of growing up;
Permit me remain like this.
Let me enjoy the pretentious ignorance;
Let me stay calm and aloof;
Let me stay safe.
Let me be immune from pain and joy;
As one who feels and knows nothing;
As one who doesn’t exist in this realm.
P.S.: I am not on drugs.
(And I do not practice psychedelic art.)
I only write as one who wants a drama-free life!
Hope I am not living an illusion.
So if you don’t grow and you don’t get wiser and the ins and outs of people don’t affect you, what does that make you? I’m not arguing that this wouldn’t be wonderful, but what label applies? What have you become?
Trent, to kill the fun, I’ll say: I doubt that it’s possible at all. For instance, I am here today because I learnt to eat (and not get stuck on breastmilk). The list goes on.
On the other hand, to speak for my character, Peter, I guess that’d make me a god maybe, with the power to live without being influenced by life’s lessons and experiences. Also, it could mean I’m incredibly dumb and blind to the real world. A perfect simpleton!
I don’t know how to completely express this, but I sense that whatever voices give rise to whatever gibberish comes out of my fingers actually started with me from the beginning but at first I didn’t understand and now while I still don’t, at least there’s mutual respect. Youth outsmarts us all.
Trent, I am not sure I get what you mean. But, I don’t think your first comment was gibberish. If, perchance you are referring to your post http://trentlewin.com/2012/10/12/queen-in-england/#comment-1290, then I agree -that post was brilliant gibberish.
Well I am mostly theorizing on why some people write or where their voices come from. I feel mostly childish most of the time, and steer away from being too serious. But that sometimes results in the blackest writing too – maybe the suppressed adult trying to get out. Let’s keep them caged. They are the monkeys.
Indeed then, youth does outsmart us. I freestyle that way too many times. I have to say, though, that mine come from a grown-up kindda; and not often a child. A grown-up who has seen the blissful innocence of childhood, witnessed the inhibitions and pains dumped on the adult; and found a release from it all -a kind of liberty and ease. So I write: in fond memories of childhood, sad acknowledgement of life on the outside currently and in expression of the new life I have found.
As for expressions that appear to convey a different meaning from what’s in my thoughts as a writer: well, it does happen at times. It does happen. Lofty, almost hifalutin, words I could almost deny in my calmer moments.
Thank you, Trent. Thank you.
i HOPE my laughing won’t affect you ! Good luck Peter .
Bounce, I am not sure I can be this character I have written out here because your laughter (seemingly sarcastic) immediately made me also laugh.
However, I am sure my creation feels no hurt.
So, why do people get affected by experiences –
Just comes with our nature/psychological makeup?
But we do not react automatically to all we experience? We don’t get sad every time we can’t find food to eat?…
So, we can also CHOOSE? Why not choose to remain immune to the death of a lover?
(*shaking my head at that proposition*)
My laughter was not sarcastic , I have wished to be immune to pain many times , gratefully I am not . With-out pain what does joy mean ? I choose to feel , I believe you do also . I go to the frig late at night and open the door . If the light comes on and I can find a good snack , that feels good . If not I will still feel hungry , maybe a little sad but I will choose to forget about it . Thanks for a short look at your thinking . Enjoy your days !
Some thoughts there, Bounce. True that we wish pain away at times when in pain. It’s only with time one learns to appreciate pain IN THE MIDST of painful situations.
I don’t how how much of our feelings are left to choice. From the involuntary pain you feel after a dirty slap to the hurt you naturally feel after losing a lover. And the list goes on.
About appreciating joy without sorrow, let me say two things:
One, I don’t know if it’s possible to feel happy without necessarily moving from a stage of sadness. Consider this as a feeling of content. But, there is none amongst us who can say how that really feels, because we have been exposed to pain since we came here.
Two, I think we can make do with some peace. Is that too much to ask after a life full of toils and sorrows?! Aren’t the pains some have had enough to make them appreciate an eternity of calm?
Bounce, I wish you well too. Your visit is solemnly appreciated.
I look forward to reading more of your posts , I for one have found something in common with your writing and thinking . Thanks again .
Thank you very much, Bounce. I hope to discover what that is, with time.
It’s been genuinely interesting hosting you here.